Porn is love you can see.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
Randomize
