Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
