The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
