btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
