When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
