dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Randomize
