So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
