After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
