drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
it's like iHOP with fire
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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