Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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