Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
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