I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize