mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
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