we're blogging at a bar
Are we in a gay sports bar?
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Randomize
