I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
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