so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
high people should be assigned attendants
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Randomize
