ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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