Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
my sisters under your porch take her home
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
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we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
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For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?