Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Randomize
