They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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