Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
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