Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
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