Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Randomize
