yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
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I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
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We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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