I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize