There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
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