If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
