it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
