i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
