How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Randomize
