Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
