called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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