Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.