I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
