Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I think your dad took our porno
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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