the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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