Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
