What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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