me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
this hospital has no fireball
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Randomize
