i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize