quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
