Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Randomize
