the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Randomize
