we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
