My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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