I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
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