I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
These 23 People Prove You Don’t Have To Be A 10 To Be Good In Bed
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
21 People That Had The Worst Birthdays Imaginable
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.