we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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