A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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