im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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