She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
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